With one child pulling faces like I'd asked her to burn her entire wardrobe when all I asked her to do was take the recycling out, the lad cooking himself meals that would feed an entire family (honestly, three fucking pies?), and their collective belief that a magic fairy pops around every fucking morning to clean all of their fucking dishes and mugs...well, the ones they decided could no longer fit in their fucking bedrooms as part of the ongoing experiment to see exactly how much fucking mould we can grow during lockdown...and me feeling like a sack of coronashit today - no, I'm not in the least bit fucking edging on exploding.